高空的重擊

大部分人總是欺善怕惡，只要強勢一些­的人說甚麼，引響力大一些的人帶頭做甚麼，就像是追逐風潮一樣跟­進，不論所謂是非。我也害怕被排擠，可是我更討厭追逐那些錯誤的­風潮，其實我真的覺得，做自己最好，無論你是否能成為一個團體的­帶領者，雖然大部分的機率你只會有幾個死黨，無法完全融入一個團­體，但同時也證明那種團體不夠成熟，至少當你踏出家門，不會有任­何心虛與不安。


心坎

這個端午我沒粽子吃

這個端午節我還沒吃到粽子。

上星期又是過節的時候，我照例的還是週末滾回家好讓我媽好好檢閱一下我有沒有變瘦又沒有睡覺之類的每週都念一樣的東西我都快會背了。

過節在我家當然還是頗隆重，福建菜餚只要數得出了應該是少不了，問題是我們一家大小都吃厭婆婆還是堅持啊... 在這個星期當然發生了幾件重要的事情。當我們一家大小圍桌時我媽就滔滔不絕地說這個那個，當然少不了大姐分手事件。

詳細情況我不大懂，只是說男方母親太刻薄說話難聽之類的而且他們家在彭亨，哇靠我媽說我姐倘若在那裡受委屈我們都不知道而且這段日子我姐居然受了他媽那麼多氣我們都不懂，結果現在要散了都不清楚是利是幣，結果我媽的這段話居然誘了我姑的供，我姑說原來我姐這段日子受的氣都有跟她說反而沒跟我媽說，結果兩個女人再加我二姐趁我大姐不在時滔滔不絕地又說了一堆，我媽說的哽咽然後開始拭淚，然後到我二姐說又開始哽咽 （當然這是第一次我看到我二姐居然那麼有人性！驚！）然後再到我姑，當我轉頭望向她的時候居然也眼眶泛紅啊，我的天啊，大日子的吃頓飯也搞得我鼻酸想哭，我只是靜靜坐著吃飯... 親情啊。

再兩個星期就有我第一個final，真的忙得天翻地覆，我其實忽略了身邊好多好多人，我朋友家人，請你們再體諒下，我快自由了。

思念蹦跳

好一陣子都沒在這更新，最近日子真的過得飛快，感覺晃一晃又是一周過去了然後我還是一樣的一直在忙，忙那永遠都趕不完的設計，日子平淡得像死水一般。

上星期的其中一天當我還是在趕起床趕洗澡趕穿鞋着上課，大門的落地窗上居然停住了一隻頗大隻的蚱蜢，那麼頭一遭的事，尤其是在我宿色這泥筋地裡哪來的草地當然令我覺得訝異了一下。

我老是覺得他的眼神很鄙夷的藐視我哈

漫盪在這鳥不生蛋的城市裡突來的驚訝偶爾還是會使我興奮一下。

以前在家裡突然地有一些大體積的生物到訪老一輩都是會說那是逝世的親人回來探親了，千萬不可捕殺或驚動它們，突然地很懷念小時候的我。

思念蹦蹦跳跳，隨著蚱蜢跳躍的弧線輕輕地停落在門前捎來了想念的氣息。

那不驚動的是淚水，不打擾的是悲傷。

親愛的別難過了，那離別意味著解脫，意味著寬恕，意味著滿足。

別忘了那慈祥的笑容，那是你前進的泉源，堅信的意志。

婆婆，祝你一路好走。

輕勾  輕勾  輕勾  輕勾  輕勾  輕勾

刷的都是你的思念，撥的都是你的畫面

輕輕彈奏畫面出現的都是你

為何 結果會那樣

oh fukalldaway! can everything just simplify as easy as pie, for god sake!!!

the last ann.

As it goes, this is the 4th day from you requested it, I know you were counting day by day, probably you will be reading this post too, once I thought of changing my bloglink as what you've done, but ended up I didn't... that was too selfish, trying to disappear in just a moment try to avoid the person once you were intimately close with, that is so cruel.

I do think of it for days, thinking of begging you for forgiveness, swearing to you I will be good as the way you want it but end up, I just got the gut to text you trying to ask you to come back but thing does not happen as I wish anymore. I know you were struggling too, if we do really get back together again, what then? Promises seem to become a toy for us to kick here and there... I feel painful whenever I recall those memories and even  heartsore thinking of the situation we are facing right now. It's been more than a year and right now I can barely feel you, the loneliness as before has come back again, feeling lost, insomnia and I got no mood at all to touch my final... It has been procrastinates for a week, when I face my drawings, I feel nothing but moody, I don't know what should I do next... I feel lost.

I'm really sorry I hurt your feeling, every time I feel like I have tons of word to be pour but when I talk to you, come out nothing and leave you frustrated. I'm so hopelessly and feeling lost right now by reading your message, every words from you are killing me inside out, I forced myself not to read your blog anymore but I did it and tear unconsciously, every hours try to refresh your wall to check out any news from you...

Your decision is the greatest punishment. Everything soon to be vanish. 

because of the absence of light.

I got a very weird dream yesterday, I dream about I've been to the country I wanted to go so much as a vocation with family and you were not here with me, I felt lost and dreamy when I'm travelling around, I had forgot to picture down in my mind every places I been to as I'll do it usually, I've forgot to enjoy the moments when I'm there, what I remember was I felt panic and lost wherever I been to, even though I'm with my family but yet I felt so far from them. Things continue to be blurish and until I realized I lost few of my precious belongings like my dslr camera, lomo camera and things you gave to me, and I've no idea what's happening and they just gone in a sudden.... by the moment I jump up from the dream what left for me was just panic still.

我把陽光忘了，忘了那給予我熱情與溫暖的力量。
我把歡樂忘了，忘了那給予我開心與喜歡的力量。
我把曾經忘了，忘了那給予我經歷與過程的旅程。

我心裡丟了一塊肉，那麼糾結那麼疼。
我想卸下面具然後緊緊地抱著一個人讓我狠狠地放聲嚎哭。

something about my part time

Last saturday was one of my darling birthday celebration at her house, seeing her busy here and there, incoming call all night long it's kinda tiring and pity of her, that's the pain of having so many friend isn't it?

Sorry for not showing her face, because the pics still not out yet, so, happy birthday to you darling, by the way tomorrow only the actual date of it, so gonna see you again probably? love you :)

It is more like a maluri friends reunion than a birthday celebration haha, all the friends that have not meet up for so long, that's the night for us to crap. I've received a text message from Jack informing to work for a shooting on the next day which is yesterday.

As my close friends should know I'm working part time under a photographer as a assistant of him not shooting lol. One thing I like about this part time, I can visit lots of buildings together with him (he is a photographer shooting for interior and exterior mostly) which I can observe lots of things while I'm working :D

Yesterday went to the Wisma Prestige(if I'm not mistaken) which just next to klcc and shooting for "the Nomad" office interior, one best thing of this office is they have a great view looking out to the KLCC.

I snapped a few photos while lepaking in the offices :D

While I'm snapping one photos of Jack and his stuffs he asked me a awkward question. He asked: Eric, do you think I'm a good photographer? and I was like... ... ... *stunned*(my brain was searching words to praise him lol) and said: yes, of course, you have a very good sense of spaces, you want to hear this right? then I pause a little while and continue, coz you're my boss mah... then we both laugh... ha ha ha what a awkward moment, lol. 

At night then I dated bun for dinner and movie, have a leisure and relaxing night. We went to curve to bersiar-siar, people were so busy and I'm so free and lazy leaning on the railing thinking of how long more this kind of precious moments I can have....

The hunger game is a very good movie if you have time why not head to the cinema?

miss you ;)

Crap for what's happening!

It has been quite a long time ago for me to update a proper post about things around me since I can't sleep at this moment, let's crap in the midnight post! hell yea!

That's time ago, when I first met about lomography I was totally fell for it and yearn for one of the lomo camera till my desire died when I "found" myself an iphone, Iphone is brilliant LOL, because there is lomoapp in the phone. Long after that, finally I got my Diana from my babe, that's one of the greatest gift i ever received haha.

Taking a good photo with a lomocam is not as easy as i thought tho, paid high expectation on my first film but end up with few photos only which "usable" after developed, so, on my wayyy learning to master my Nana!

100% guaranty ili will scold me about posting this pic! not in fb anyway :D

Yesterday night, spent a dinner with my precious 1 in kl. I was surprised kl has such restaurant hidden in a busy street. A good dinner with good companion, nice meal and nice person what to condemn? thanks for the 13 and all the best in chasing your dream and once again congrats, you're promoted hun!

Went to Putrajaya to check out hotair balloon festival since today it's the last day of the event, quite sad because by that time we reach there its already night time, so there are only 4 hotair balloon left and it's not flying!!! lol, probably the weather is bad and strong wind.

I'm addicted to multi-exposure recently :)

there's nothing much could awkward than driving with a person that you're not close to in a car and all the way to kelana jaya... i'm so tension and focusing on my drive since it's was avanza, floaty and bumpy enough to push the awkward scenario to the climax! hahahaha, but for melissa, i can do it *wink*

the tethered hotair balloon, one of it fell down coz of the strong wind :/

Putrajaya's main bridge. I'm so "close" to this bridge already.

went to our old place, chongqing super spicy steamboat for our dinner. It's a warm and happy dinner after so long. ps: it's already 4.24 in the morning and i'm still full!

done crapping, kthxbai good night :)

i hope you're just fine as what you've told us, may god bless our family.

you should read this if you're from architecture background

ARCHITECTS AND A DEVELOPING MALAYSIA

For everyone’s benefit, below is Ar.Nazlan’s article which has been posted to The Star and New Straits Times, but yet to be published. This is the gist of the Memorandum.
“I would refer to the very low passing rate to this year’s Lembaga Arkitek Malaysia or LAM Part 3 Professional Examination for the registration of professional architects in Malaysia.”

Many have expressed dismay and some, bewilderment at one of the lowest, if not possibly the lowest passing rate ever at less than 10% who made it through. I for one, cannot for the life of me, figure out how the Government of Malaysia and parents to private students can spend millions of good public and private money to send some of the cream of the country’s students to very good universities and institutes, local and foreign, only to have over 90% of them fall flat at the very last hurdle called the LAM Pt 3 Professional Exam that is created by their own fraternity.

If you think I am being paranoid, how would one then attest to these figures below.

1 UK.
Population : 61.6 million
Registered architects : 33,000
Ratio architect to population : 1 to 1,860
Mean annual prof exam pass rate : 80%
Mean annual registered architects : ~1,000

2 HONG KONG.
Population : 7.1 million
Registered architects : 2,166 [2007]
Ratio architect to population : 1 to 3,230
Mean annual prof exam pass rate : 29%
Mean annual registered architects : N/A

3 AUSTRALIA.
Population : 22.1 million
Registered architects : 9,500
Ratio architect to population : 1 to 2,330
Mean annual prof exam pass rate : 86%
Mean annual registered architects : N/A

4 NEW ZEALAND.
Population : 4.3 million
Registered architects : 1,730
Ratio architect to population : 1 to 2,490
Mean annual prof exam pass rate : 70%
Mean annual registered architects : N/A

5 MALAYSIA.
Population : 28.3 million
Registered architects : 1,700
Ratio architect to population : 1 to 16,650
Mean annual prof exam pass rate : 9% [2009], 20% max. since 1970.
Mean annual registered architects : 20~30

Clearly, Malaysia is leading the pack – from behind!

We recognize the qualifications of our candidates studying from Commonwealth universities, but when they return home to offer their ‘services’ to their nation, they simply don’t seem to measure up. What is so special about the It would seem that Malaysia is probably the most difficult country in the world to pass a professional exam for the architect.Which makes our architect a very rare breed indeed. If we are passing candidates like they do in the UK, we should have 15,200 registered architects by now, not 1,700. If we pass them like the Aussies, the Kiwis and Hong Kong, we should already have about 8,700 to 12,100, and not 1,700.

These countries above are all Commonwealth nations, with very similar systems of education and government that is based on the English constitutional system. We even drive on the same side of the road. Lest some of us would say that one cannot compare the professional exams to suit the conditions of one country to the next, we cannot deny the numerous demographic factors that are similar. Why, a very good majority of our graduates have even studied and passed their exams from universities of these Commonwealth countries for LAM/PAM recognizes their degrees over the Americans, Japanese, Germans, Italians and the French counterparts which have architectural courses that are not recognized by LAM. The strange thing is that you can find some of the most beautiful buildings designed by architects originating from these countries with ‘unrecognized’ degrees.

And herein lies more irony.
LAM professional exams that seem to make it the most difficult exam in the world for the architect to pass anyway?

Over the years, we have blamed it on the candidates’ poor knowledge of their contracts, and the quality of their practical experiences. Are we then saying that the practical experience afforded by Malaysian architectural practices and government agencies [like JKR] in which these candidates are attaining their professional skills from are way below the standard that LAM is seeking? Is the majority of Malaysian practices and related government agencies so substandard in their quality of training? Are our practices involved in ‘chicken shed’ building projects or minor works extensions that do not cover the full spectrum needed for professional endorsement? What about the practices that helped develop Putrajaya and some of the world’s most recognizable icons in Malaysia? Are they not good enough for our candidates to garner crucial experiences in design, contract management, statutory procedures, tender exercises and construction supervision?

Some of the UK’s top architectural firms hire hundreds of registered architects. For a job the size of a university campus, as an example, a UK office will deploy a typical team of at least half a dozen qualified architects if not more, with a score of technical assistants and technicians to handle the full scope of service required to get a quality job done well. Here in Malaysia, the norm would be that the job can be given to a one-man office with the single registered practitioner assisted by perhaps a couple of Pt 2 graduates and probably 4 draftspersons. It really is all about NUMBERS. Oh, yes. Quality is important too, but please, let us not get ‘over-paranoid’ about quality. Just look at the above figures again. Are we saying the British numbers lack quality? Dare we say the Aussies have the numbers but their quality is suspect?

We just do not have the numbers of ‘certified knowledge workers’ [read, professional architects] to go by with, and it doesn’t help to think that this is because our Pt 3 Exam is of an exceedingly high standard. For some strange reason or another, we seem to pride ourselves into thinking that we must make it difficult for new candidates to join the ‘established elite’ of professional architects, and so the exams are seemingly made very difficult to pass.

Take this one step further, and let us look at the numbers on other professionals in Malaysia.

6 DOCTORS.
Average pass rate % : 22%
Registered Medical Practitioners : 20,500

7 LAWYERS.
Average pass rate % : 36%
Registered Lawyers : 14,300

8 ENGINEERS.
Average pass rate % : 70~90%
Registered Engineers : 9,600

9 ACCOUNTANTS.
Average pass rate % : 30~40%
Registered Accountants : 26,000

And let us compare this again with architects.

10 ARCHITECTS.
Average pass rate % : 9~20%
Registered Architects : 1,700

From these figures, it would seem that in Malaysia, it is more difficult to be an architect than even a doctor!

Furthermore, the pass rate for doctors above is for those with unrecognised degrees only. The majority of medical students who studied at universities recognised by the MMA, have mostly passed their professional ‘exam’ through their housemanship programme.

I don’t think many people know these facts. I certainly did not, before embarking on this little research. It is small wonder then, that in the past few years, many of my young nieces and nephews, and even my own daughter have preferred to study medicine. Looking at these figures, I wouldn’t blame them. Which parent in their right mind would now want to invest their children’s future in architecture when they have a brighter chance of making it through as a doctor.

Malaysia is a developing country. One would have thought that we would be in dire need for professionals to help with nation building. The UK, Hong Kong and Australia are fully developed nations and have been so for a lot longer than us. And they must have done it with the help of their architects who are undeniably a crucial factor for the ‘engine of growth’ in any country aspiring for development.

We have here in Malaysia, top leaders with a very ambitious programme to turn the nation into a fully developed status by 2020, but sadly, this ambition does not seem to be shared by a ‘professional elite’ who are supposed to SPEARHEAD this very programme.

What does these figures above tell us? What is going to be the ‘national’ consequence of this diabolical state of affairs? That in a decade, and with only about 2,000 professional architects since independence, we hope to help Malaysia become fully developed? Can these figures help convince PM Dato’ Seri Najib that Tun Dr Mahathir’s Vision 2020 will be realised? Can this seriously be done with the dearth of knowledge workers whom the country’s leaders have desperately sought to produce since the days of Tun Razak? What about the Prime Minister’s own vision of turning Malaysia from a middle income society to that of a high income country? Wouldn’t the registration of more professional architects help with his noble cause?

I have come across many candidates [some have failed five, six times] who have been in a state of despondency over the years, and have gotten to a stage where they just don’t know what to do to get past the Pt 3 hurdle. And I would wonder if the medical profession, or our engineers and lawyers have similar situations. Just how a graduate architect can attain and gather all the experience of running project after project for years on end in an architectural office, and STILL end up failing the professional exam beats me…. See More

I am not, for one moment, suggesting that LAM immediately turn the tables and start passing all manner of Pt 3 candidates come hell or high water to meet the 2020 deadline. And I am pretty certain that there are many candidates amongst the 90% who failed this year deservedly did so, as my experience as a Pt 3 Tutor tells me that there are candidates who do have a long way to go before they can be considered good enough to practice. All I am saying is that a 10% pass rate seem too utterly low, inconceivably illogical, bordering on being downright ridiculous and even, as some of these unfortunate candidates have put it, grossly unfair.

The LAM President had, in her Star On-line article of 28 November, succinctly put it “In the absence of a better system, to gauge the candidates’ readiness for professional practice, the present LAM Pt 3 exams seem to be the most appropriate form of assessment…”. But my dear Madam, I beg to infer that with these figures above, the system – in it’s present form is far from appropriate in the context of nation building. LAM needs a major review of their examination system so that we do not unfairly penalise candidates, and more importantly, we do not penalise Malaysia’s ambition to be a fully developed nation within the next decade.

Malaysia need the NUMBERS, and we need them fast!

Information source: 

Ar Nazlan bin Baharudin, http://al-aajily.com/senibina/hanya-9-lulus-lam-part-3-setiap-tahun/

五色五音令人目盲耳聋

靜謐地悶夜一絲不漏地籠罩在淡藍色的月光下，
雖然還是17了但天上的月亮還是很亮晰很皎潔，它輕輕地撫動着地平線上的萬物。

一輛半殘不舊的長途巴士依然奔馳在大路上，試圖掀開那淡藍色的輕紗掙扎着逃離那悶熱的被子。
巴士裡很安靜很安靜除了前面那嘗試聚精會神地開車司機且一邊吵雜地對著電話大聲嚷嚷，似乎根本不理會車子裡一大票人剽向他那異樣的厭煩眼光，繼續百無聊賴地握著那笨重的方向盤。

車子裡有著兩鬢發白的老配偶，有著臉蛋稚嫩的孩子，仔細聽聽，在車子裡的角落時不時發出一對男女的抱怨聲，怨聲連連，女的埋怨為什麼當初會瞎了眼，男的呈安慰狀地不住說在為她改變等等，可幸的是他們前座的乘客帶著耳機毫不理會。


車子裡裝着的是無視、是漠視、是卑微、是自私、是不諒解，而不是乘客。
它繼續奔行，在人們自認為地康莊大道上。

當人在愛情裡每個人都想努力地成為對方眼中喜歡的那個人，我們應該忠於原始的自己努力地讓對方愛上自己而不是前者。

杯子外的魚

滿足於現在的生活是多麼開心的一件事，凡事再放開一些，心再放寬一些，得到的會比預想的更多，更滿足。


現在吃喝拉撒都處於愉快的狀態，偶爾上一下課等放學然後再虛度光陰實在太酷啦！

身邊的人事物都處於良好狀態，沒病沒痛，偶爾聊天打屁偶爾逗弄小孩，三不五時往外跑跑，身心良好旅途愉快，內心放晴，全身上下毛細孔都盡情呼吸那格外清新含氧度爆表的空氣哈！

就像杯子外的魚，撲溜撲溜地。



hey do you feel,
do you feel me,
do you feel what I feel too?

before this special day ends, I'd like to thanks for everything you gave to me and i'm so much delighted recently!
new baby toy for my interest, new experiences, new sweet moments!

wait for the photos folks! :D

ciao

suddenly feeling so sick and headache, probably this few days too rush or what?
by the way hopefully it goes away quickly! I can't wait for this :D

gotta ciao for few days :D

drag it babehhh

procrastinating again and again... there will be a test on next wed and we were being informed on last few days and I told myself not to study on the day before exam but I still dragging it days by days....it's so lazy to get started :/

can somebody else go lantern festival with me tomorrow? please... Bun said bun not free... so what to do :/

站直的蛋

立春還真可靠過人，雞蛋還真全都站著。

新春

距離上一次的更新已有隔一年了 （翻白眼）

我沒像別人的部落格那樣分享自己的年終總結，新一年的願望等等，也許是我一直以來都沒那樣做的習慣，要跟上這股風還不是很適合。我覺得達成自己整年裡該做的東西就好了。

新的一年還是老樣子，感覺自己又長大一點，然後身邊又出現新臉孔，譬如在學院然後還得假裝自己很帥很拉風的樣子再一臉學長樣地瞟向剛新進學院的雛鳥們... 如果你們現在讀着這段話別給我裝B啦，我懂你們也那樣。 (再翻白眼）

過了年莫過于期待農曆新年，我自己是很喜歡熱鬧的人，看著街上開始堆起年貨烤起肉乾掛起紅燈籠我會異常興奮，又過節了唷。

只是今年的新年我多了好多感觸，親戚還是老樣子追問你還在讀書嗎之類的問題，每一年來都問同樣的問題煩不煩啊，我修繪測的都跟修醫生的同長了，這真是折磨啊。
女朋友呢，怎麼還沒交女朋友啊，還有雞婆的會瞟刮你一眼然後爆出一句該不會你搞同志啊你之類的腦殘問題。

只是今年有點不一樣了，21歲了，居然有親戚要給我介紹他小我一歲的女兒，我真的是尷尬得不知道如何反應啊，然後只得瞄像我媽讓她打圓場，然後我趕緊附和的說自己沒能力啦等等地然自己都覺得汗顏的話。這樣的情況發生了幾次只是我身邊求救的人物換了幾次，我媽，我姐，我婆...直到我笑吟吟地把他們送離我家大門這事才擺手。

這一年我感到特別地羨慕，嫉妒身邊的人，都能把喜歡的人帶回家，然後可以與他們分享自己與家人的喜悅及歡樂。好不羨慕，親愛的我好想把你帶回家，然後一一把你介紹，一起領紅包然後很開心的在公眾把頭靠一起。